" It's 5 o' clock in the morning ....conversation got boring." No Lilly Allen playing , just me wide awake at 5 am . At first I'm my usual hyper self then hours go by and I'm annoyed .I can not fall asleep. Big day tomorrow. Hell everyday is a big day lately. After creating chalkboard inspiration to picking up material for a new desk to seeing tons of clients, tweeting, FBing, emailing, you name it I should be tired .I stop .I put my perfect tiny computer down and I stop. I realize I again forgot to eat dinner.
Life has literally been throwing me Peyton Manning style passes this year . Some of them catchable and BOOM there's me high steppin my way into the end zone #Touchdown .Some I'm running my route and shit I'm too far out... incompletion. My play books are out now I gotta know the ratio of completions I've been making. Well really it's a collection of 3 notebooks, an iPhone , my MacBook and me searching everywhere that makes no sense to find the idea I knew I had written down , that for sure I wrote down!
I looked at all the ideas ,all the things I had ever wanted or wished for . Create my own business (check). Have a few very BEST girlfriends to rely on that are fabulous in their own right(check). Have a room with a view (check but minus one for the mugging incident ). Travel to places I had only heard about...hellloo ...Lake Tahoe,LA ,San Diego, Hollywood,Vegas (check double check check )! Amie teased me with every pic I sent "Dang are you Beyonce ?" I said screw it this year and told myself self ,work hard play hard dammit. After looking over all the evidence in front of me I was shocked to find more.I had to make a pot of coffee.
I've moved to the balcony at this point .It's 6am and there's a luscious sunset brewing I might as well enjoy it . Holy hell I see it ! The cause of all my sleeplessness and anxiety ! It's happiness and it's about to make me it's B*&ch! Happiness is now running at me like a linebacker ,full speed all ,6" 2 of it. My favorite summer memory was chasing sunsets with an incredibly fine man with charm and a heart for days . #sacked # LawrenceTaylorstyle
I turn my chair to face east. It is SO close to being a perfect sunrise and I'm awake to see it all because my little brain wouldn't power down tonight . I'm pretty excited now ! I look to my right and see my reflection in my sweet floor to ceiling windows and realize I'm in my underwear. Bursts of laughter ensue. " I'm in my 30's it's my sexy body and I do what I want ," I say to my reflection as I look to the high rise across for peeping toms.
It's 7 am now and the light from the sun in shining on the water in unbelievable shades of pink (my 3g camera is doing this spectacle no justice). Through the sunrise and the fading of the night sky into a new day I see the flaws in my playbook. I have everything I could ever wanted and things are getting better every.single.day. I'm not taking enough time to slow dance, maybe challenge a call or two and risk being penalized to see true happiness is staring me in the face.I have be the one passing the ball now. !( I know it's a lot of football talk, sorry just how my brain relates things).
I always preach true success is not how much you accomplish but how much you help others to accomplish. So I'm on a mission to do just that . Details coming soon , positive vibes are always appreciated. Until later I'm off it's 7:40 and I got some urban hiking to do.
Stay Golden,
Jenny
